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A year in review
Whew child! 2020 has been a year where I have stepped fully into damn myself. No longer worried about what others think of me and how I express myself. It has been a year for telling my story on my own terms. Embracing my spirituality and growing into my relationship with my Ancestors. Realizing that I have to be honest with myself, even when it hurts. Healing is a journey, even when you think you are finished, there is always more.
This year has also been the year for asking for help and building community. Being dependent on others and allowing people in has been a struggle. Not just a struggle, but a strug-gleee! Past trauma does that to us if we are not careful. Our past will show up in the present as self-sabotaging behavior or imposter syndrome and we don’t even realize it. I am grateful to my Ancestors and the Creator that amazing sister-friends are in my life who give it to me straight, no chaser! The end of 2020 has been emotional, but very much needed. A purge of my past to bring forth the love, sisterhood, and abundance I deserve.
Now that, that is out of the way, this has been a year of self-portraits for me. Honestly, it has helped me be a better boudoir photographer when I practice posing. It has also helped me get in touch with my inner goddess, sensuality, and sexuality. Check out my Tulum selfies here. My phone has been my self-portrait camera, but I decided to take it up a notch and use my baby with it’s self-timer. I plan to make this a monthly personal project and at the end of 2021 see my progression. Enjoy and Happy New Year!
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Fearless and 35
Fearless and 35! 34 did not end how I thought it would… in a damn pandemic! I didn’t let it stop me, but propel me to plan. Every year I plan to do something that challenges or is out of the ordinary for me. Before my 34th year ended I did three things, that were out of the ordinary for me. I traveled solo to Tulum, Mexico, and relaxed like I have never relaxed before. I did nothing, but read, ate, and got massages. I even had time to do an affirmation video that you can check out on my IG TV . I did travel to Greece solo, but this trip I was actually by myself. No meetups planned, just me.
I logged out of social media and enjoyed my company. I sat outside and listened to the roosters be loud as hell. I ate tacos and drank tequila. I walked the streets of Tulum and even went to the beach. Going to the beach was so freeing. I stuffed my face and me and my big belly walked right to the ocean. I felt at peace.
Check out my mini self portraits I took during the trip.
The second thing I did was get my nose pierced! I was scared shitless for sure, but I did it. I even had to do it twice because it fell out a week after I got it the first time. That was not fun and I do not recommend it.
The third thing I did was have a boudoir experience with Celeste Patrice Boudoir. Whew child Celeste got me and I felt like a damn goddess. I was even able to help her by modeling with a friend for a couples experience. I cannot wait for the adventures I plan to take during 35! What are some things you plan to do this year by stepping on the other side of fear? Will you be fearless and free at any age?
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Empowered Interview: The Female Orgasm
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3 REASONS WHY I CAN’T DO A BOUDOIR EXPERIENCE
As a Black woman, I understand the statistics about us. 80% of Black households are run by Black women. On the other side of this is we are the fastest-growing segment of the population for growing businesses. We are also the most educated. Do you know what this really means, we are FUCKING TIRED. Literally we are tired of being everything for everyone and not doing enough for ourselves.
I am 34 years old and I tell you I still have moments when I feel bad for buying something for myself. This stems from my past relationship and I know that. I recently bought a purse and didn’t take off the tag because it felt like a very indulgent purchase. Here is the crazy thing, I am a single woman with no children and I still second-guessed this purchase! So I know other women who have the same dilemma I did. Then I remembered that I deserve to have beautiful things, amazing experiences, and be to be spoiled.
Having a boudoir experience can feel like a self – indulgent leap for you. You are literally doing something that is ALL about you. All about identifying your version of sexy. Embracing your divine feminity and making your own choices. This can be very scary because it can be easy to make decisions for others, but not for when it comes to investing in ourselves.
Having your own boudoir experience will change you. Change you in ways that can be subtle or profound. No matter the type of change it always takes place and it is amazing to see. Amazing to hear the stories, witness the tears of joy and see the excitement in a Beautie’s eyes. Witness the love she has for herself when she is able to see herself as a beautiful Black goddess worthy of praise.
Now in order to get to this point, she has to get over a few barriers. Here are the top 3 barriers I hear for not having a boudoir experience:
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Divine Feminity with Ms. J
This gorgeous Beauty sent me this at the beginning of the year and I am just getting around to posting it. I have been all over the place and have finally stopped to smell the roses. Or at least stop to upload this Beautie’s images and videos. Her spirit was amazing and she personified being her authentic self. Check it out below! Tell me in the comments which image is your favorite.